Dancing is my dream and my life

Growing up

2010-11-02T09:15:00.000-07:00

Will U Be by Myside ?

Learning the reality

2010-11-02T08:59:00.000-07:00

So its been long i haven posted as i just wanted to let my feelings out :) Well its been 2 months plus and everything is going fine...just a bit paranoid here and there......well me as usual......but its just that i cant help it..i dont know if i can withstand the whole thing....i am not bored and shaped that way....or maybe i will face that in the future...and i cant always go to my family all the time. Eventually i need to grow up...will there be really a person always beside me :( or it is faith-ed i need to face this alone...why cant everything be easy. Well it is true that ppl say that if u dont get through all this probs and challenges u wont grow stronger , but its just hard to learn when u always get stuff u want easily. Being pampered and protected the whole time is not a good thing after all then :( WELL I NEED TO FACE IT ANYWAYS, so why not look at the bright side :) i can deal with it and get the best out of it :) but i just wish that someone will be there beside every second so i wont be alone ....will there? will u ?? or thats not the right que can u ? cause i know i am asking too much ... i wont blame u if u cant :) i will do well on my own right :)

U

2010-06-02T01:36:00.000-07:00

The new post of my previous life :)

2010-03-23T08:11:00.001-07:00

OMG i am actually writing a new post....this is so weird anyways.
ok soooo....my blog has been dead for months.its nearly one year haha XD
so anyways here goes.
form 4 end of the year..went for YE programme in japan...IT WAS AWESOME!!! so i gained a lot of new friends and learned how to kinda take care of myself without parents supervision..ok maybe under homestay parents supervision but its diff la . lol .
Before going to japan a lot happened in school when i was away with my japanese intensive course which kinda helps haha XD at least i can read but no point cause i dont know what it means anyways. So the things that happened was i miss Bio class (DISSECTING THE FROG) i missed it !!! what kind of bio student misses that class haha .
Of course mainly that is not the big prob a lot happened....apparently best friends split apart and some just drew away from each other....i really dont know how can this happen in 2 weeks time...maybe its because of all the accumulation of anger between each other...and one day it just exploded...who knows..kinda know that feeling and going through that....but i hope that wont happen to me..at least me and my bff know when to stop and each others limits....as far as i know we are still at the safe zone. i guess :/ that is for my form 4 life then
so Form 5 :)
brand new year.....got closer to my classmates ..HAPPY XD
for ur info, my relations with my school friends are aweful from form 1 to 3.. i mean i form 3 it became better and i know who my real friends are....:) SO i joined cheer again...this time we still didnt win it... but i think we are already winners.,...once a red always a red :) red rocks!!! haha
there were no stunts this year...that was the boring part but the DaNCE WERE JUST SO CUTE XD
haha thanks to the seniors!!! =]
Enough of cheer ,, oh i forgot i made up a crew during last year too...It was a great experience . TAC CREW ROCKS !!! apparently it didnt work out cause mainly i cant cope with the stress and responsibilities which i think i shouldnt be handling this year...i will write a post only for this next time....
So NOW THIS YEAR
important things to focuse on SPM SPM SPM
either than that grade 7 and intermediate foundation (ballet )
gosh stress wei....
not only that also paramount:)
duet and group singing and modern dancing
maybe skit too
Cant wait for modern dancing...hope it will go well
haha XD
*flash back of humiliation during lower secondary...that was aweful....ok WTV this year will be the best :)
so i think this post is long enough ahah XD
i better stop or not i dunno when i am going to end ....hope this makes up for the previous ones...i know ppl dont read my blog cause they all think its dead...i wonder who will actually read this haha XD
anyways just a way to release stress so no harm :)
ciao for now then

tagged by ee wen baby

2009-08-21T02:13:00.000-07:00

1. Besides your lips, where is your favorite spot to get kissed?
shoulder i think...

2. How did you feel when you woke up this morning?
sick and i think i got h1n1(opps)

3. Who was the last person/people you took photo with?
celine ( it was her birthday)

4. Would you consider yourself spoilt?
yes i think but not alwasys

5. Will you ever donate blood?
no not old enough haha

6. Have you ever had a best friend of the opposite sex?
yes....i think i still have it lol

7. Do you want someone to be dead?
no why.....(maybe) lols

8. What does your last message say?
hey i am really sorry.....(long text) from rachel yeo

9. What are you thinking right now?
how to get me jumping again

10. Do you want someone to be with you right now?
yes (My mom as i said i am sick)

11. What was the time you went to bed last night?
some where at 1am

12. Where did you buy the tee you are wearing now?
one u or sunway i think

13. Is someone in your mind right now?
nope

14. Who was the last person who text you?
rachel yeo

Tag 10 "lucky" people do this quiz.
-soo wei
-arya
-shermin
-evonne
-carine
-sook teng
-hillary
-rachel yeo
-ee wen (can i tag her again lols)
-nicoel lam(nicole go do it again
hah)

15. Who is number two (arya) having a relationship with?
i dont think there is someone(but i am getting suspicious)

16. Is number three (shermin) a male or female?
female

17. If number 7 (hillary) and number 1 (soo wei) get together will it be good?
omg!! lesbos.....

18. What is number 1 (soo wei) studying?
*same school as mua

19. Is number 4 (yes) single?
maybe( she didnt tell me)

20. Say something about number 6 (sook teng).
* she doesnt seem what she looks like...a fun person...in the lunch gang...

21. What you think of number 3 (shermin) and number 6 (sook teng) being together?
they are both girls k...=.=

22. Describe number 9 (ee wen).
* listener...adviser....one of my babes....sexy....fun to be with....wild but moody sometime...

23. Do you like number 8 (Joel)?
* yes!she is my one of my babes too...love you

Finally, finish :)
time wasted : didnt take count

PPL

2009-08-18T09:48:00.001-07:00

Today was ok....a bit moody at first though....sorry i broke the promise...i cant hold it..it was bugging me.....was gonna break down any second in class..thanks soo wei for talking wiht me to get it out of my mind.But u gotta be open girl!Dont keep it all to yourself k!u can ask me anything...an u are one of us lol...love u!!

merdeka carnival

2009-08-14T07:55:00.000-07:00

So it was quite a day today.....My school has organized a merdeka carnival...The fun thing was we got to play treasure hunt.yeah.....great experience although we didnt win anything but at least we had a great time and added another memory. so after that i did hana,i think its spelled like that oh well. i paid 10 bucks for hand and foot. its so pretty ....so then i counted money for the club and was running uo and down the ramp for the stupid cheque.arghhhh...oh ya,,we went to the haunted house too.me ,ee wen,nicole,rachel,hillary,mun yee,oh and huey jen was the org panduan lol. ok after that met the person i am pissed of,dont even let me get there. we will just skip it. hen everyonr went home and i was left alone so sad......after sleeping in the car through the journey back home, rested and went for ballet. did half hour of point work and i think i got a freaking blister . oh well wish that it pays off at the end ..my leg is like hurting like crap now. and i still nedd to make a card for my grandfather and i dont have a nice cutboard how am i going to do it.......ishhhhhh ,figure that out later need to rest .....lol

sweet 16 (pics= danish,ee wen and athirah)

2009-08-13T10:43:00.000-07:00

I had a really great birthday this year.Its the second time i invited sri kduians to my party. But this time was different because i am very close to my new gang...cause i dont need to keep all my feelings to myself.. I am really happy to find u guys in KDU.SO enough of the eeky talking Firstly,I am very sorry that i was late.I think this is the first time a host is late for her own party cause i got to get the cake from the cupcake place. The cupcake was so pretty. That was the highlight of the party lol. Credits to my favourite sister-in-law.....yeah !! OK ,i have to admit the party was kinda boring and i was kinda sesat.OK i was really sesat. i invited my previous classmates and current classmates that are close to me.I did invite my primary friends but they are not free. You know they got tuition ,transport probs and all kinds of reasons so yeah...So the party started .i am really sorry there is no entertainment i will think more harder if i am having another one next year...And i say if.so the first thing we did was eat of course as i was late sorry.....then after that i became the camera girl lol. it was fun to take pics of other ppl...Some ppl say i am weird because i am the host and i am taking pics that i am not in it . anways it was very fun ok!! so ya...after that was the cutting cake ceremony...i mean cupcake lol.Everyone said the cupcake was nice. Some of them didnt even want to eat it because it was too pretty lol.but i ate two haha.... So after the party i went to change and took crazy pics in the toilet but only two was clear oh well. We went to tgv and then to gsc but didnt get to watch a movie because everyone got to go back at the same time which is before the movie ends. so we got to cut of watching movie from the list. After that we decided to go to the rock climbing and karaoke place but as soon we reach there we found out that our outfit doesnt suite rock climbing and karaoke was freaking expensive. Then we went to the arcade and i got a cow..mua hahaha. it was a lucky shot haha. its the first time i got a doll from the kiap kiap machine by my own and i only used two coins to get it.Yeah me!! so after that we played the shooting game and the monsters was really disgusting. the guys was really concentrating on the game..So after that we went to jusco to send soo wei back. on the way we bought ice cream . Nicole kept stealing me and arya's ice cream she just took a spoon and she can get 2 free ice cream.Learned a lesson from that lol. anyways after soo wei left , we decided to head back to pick and brew. We played truth or dare and gossiped lol. then arya went back and then ee wen and nadirah. i only found out ee wen went back after asking the others like four times. i thought she went to the toilet and she might be constipating or something lol. the others laughed along but they didnt tell me.so mean...Oh well we continued gossiping until danish went back and left me ,nicole and michael. Then we went window shopping and i bought a very cute necklace yeah.....(SS)so after nicole left me and michael went for Japanese chocolate and drinks and we talked and talked until he left and then i actually found my way to my sis and sis-in -law.that was first at least i didn't get lost haha. and thats probably how my sweet 16 was celebrated.although its kinda boring to you guys but it is very meaningful to me .thank you for your wonderful presents i really love it.and also lot of thanks for your presence that is what worths the most. :) The other camera's pics will be uploaded once i get the folder..

Guys! they never change

2009-08-13T10:35:00.000-07:00

So other than that, i found out that i wasted a lot of time on some guy that those not even appreciate me and think that i should be helping him everytime he needs my help. I didnt want anything from him but just want him to at least ask how i am doing when i have probs .Oh well i know him to well, if he have done this the sky would be falling by now. SO i will just leave it aside for a while and see how it goes. Of course i still want u as a friend but u know that we wont be that close anymore .and i wont waste my time on u as i might have another person that needs my help more than u do. cause u never shown any appreciation i will just leave.U will never know how i felt anyways.
just to tell u that i am leaving u behind me and i will step forward and find someone else. To be honest i never stopped liking u until this mid year.I was suffering and waiting for u to look at me. But u was never better then ur other crushes that u chosen.Never of it worked out although i helped u. And u will never know how i suffer helping u. Oh well its all in the pass anyways the person that i like its gone because u have changed,The guy that u like before is no longer here. But pls do think of others more because u may not know if u will lose another close friend. just to let u know,We are friends but not close friends.....goodbye ..Thank you for giving me great and hurting memories. .......

High school

2009-08-13T09:50:00.000-07:00

I know its been very long i posted a new post.As u know i dont have many stuff to post about lol..So first lets look at my current school life. I am happy that i found a gang in my class to hang out with ,they are the ones that made hope for me to find happiness in school.Thank you so much guys without u guys u might be dying some unknown place by now.U guys place me back together when i fell hard at the beggining of this year. Now i have more friends to trust and talk to.I am sorry to bother u guys with my probs and i will try not to think too much. As long i am with u guys my school life will be much easier to go through. I do hope that it will be better and the ppl who hates me start accepting me but i know this will be a hard thing to hope for so as i said before i will just go with the flow.
So to the people who hate me and talk bad stuff behind my back i wann say sorry if i offended u or something .U can say out loud what my problem is.I dont mind...If u dont ever wanna be my friend i dont have a choice. I have done my part. i am fed up of being ignored when i smiled at someone and the other ppl just looks away. That is why i dont smile at ppl who i know that wont smile back at me .I learn to wait for another person to smile only i smile. This is how sri kdu ppl changed me these days but i wanna thank the ppl who taught me and ignored me or hated me. u guys have taught me a lot and now i know what kind of world i will be facing in the future.Thank you for the lesson i will bring it along for the rest of my life. This will be the last time i will be talking about this problem and i really wanna thank the ppl who help me through this especially me family and friends. Without u guys i will be lost in my own world wipping my tears of with hundred boxes of tissues. Thank you...
To be honest i really want my high school life to end sometime but the true friends that i got in KDU made me stronger than i thought so i will still continue finding my happiness and knowledge in KDU. Thank you for not giving up on me...special thanks to Ee wen,Nicole,soo wei,shermin,evonne..

the holidays

2009-06-16T08:48:00.000-07:00

So it was the holidays
and i had cheer almost everyday
i am seriously exausted
not only physically but mentally too
its just that found out some realitys in life
dont love but had to deal with it
its hard for me to get along with ppl these days
can anyone tell me my prob
i have tried to bond but it just doesnt work
where are the sparks
i miss itttttttttt
arghhhhhhhh
Some big incident happen also
lost a friend ,i dont think we will be as close anymore
i am sorry if i accuse u but then its just too scary for me
i broke down hardly that day
i shivered at night,feeling very insecure
cried twice that day
it seems that the only one i can trust was my dog
how miserable was that
oh well,its the past, i gained lessons and also a friends to talk too
thanks to that friend i am not in the MPH rolling on the floor,retardedly
lol
thanks for cheering me up
so the whole two week i didnt went out more than twice
that was so sad
everyone was busy
actually i was busy also with the performance
i was scolded that i do too much stuff
i pushed myself too hard until i dont have time to rest
and i just found that i have made my aunt's life harder because of me
now what i want is a peaceful life
Gosh is that hard for me to have one
gotta sleep now
i want my dreamland

Class test

2009-05-04T07:59:00.000-07:00

ok i screwed my class test oh well
hate to study anyway
first time i got so many c's in my life
what the hell
anyway dont wanna talk about that
i am so freaking worried about out stunners routine
we didnt even know anything yet
and we need to perform the whole routine to miss foo in like 2 weeks
mid year is coming and practice will be stopped at the same time
what are we going to do
damn why is my life always rushing through stuff
oh well i didnt blog last week because of the dance performance that i am going to be in at 24 of march
it is a taoisme thingy although i am not in the religion but just performing in it for experience sake.
Heard that at least 5 thousand ppl will be there
i am very excited never performed in front of so many ppl b4 but only excited not scared
i think because i had overcome the stage fright for dancing few years back ald thanks to my ballet teacher,gan chih pei for giving us so many opportunities to perform on stage
i really appreciate it thank you
but then the performance will be during lid year oh well at least i am not going to school on Monday
I am lucky that i am not taking physics haha
i'll just study the whole day then
thats all of my life these days
update with u guys next time if i have the mood to blog
oh and evonne i ald blogged ok!!

Why werent u there when i needed u?

2009-04-22T03:56:00.001-07:00

Today is a very dramatic earth day for me.....Most of my classmates cried today....Why cant life be easier....Dont like the atmosphere in school..Felt very guilty why does the right thing sometimes feel so wrong arghhhhhhh
Was very depressed during lunch no one to talk to.Oh well i was finding peace and quite anyway but also wanted someone beside me...sometimes feel that having a bf is actually a good thing...Oh well....dream onnnnnnnnnn
At least b4 school the atmosphere was not that stiff...I am seriously sorry if i did anything wrong .Dont wanna break any bonds....Sorry for being a very busy body person just wanna lay things out so that we can solve it
Wish that we will be like a family!Sorry if i break anyones heart..Really really sorry
the weather today was also freaking hot,no one had the strength to cheer.After the drama i was also tired. Going to go to school every sat for stunners now..Going to show miss foo the whole routine during may.Why r we always rushing..Having a bad day.............

I will always wait for u!!

2009-04-21T08:30:00.001-07:00

In the morning,we had snack time in school .Haha we got 3rd for impersonation and got the biggest hamper.Everyone was happy but the it was not complete as eunice was not there.Anyways we saved some for her..Ate a lot of junk food,....Arghh gonna grow fatter ...Need to slim down..AHHHH
After that we had our bio class,most of us fell asleep Ok not most of us,Me are farah are included la. Maybe it was the junk food.Damn u junk food...Ok the teacher was also boring haha
Arghhh gonna have my ballet exam on this friday....The good thing is i dont need to go to school but the pressure:( anyway wish me luck
I went home early to sleep haha.Wait dont judge me yet..I have a reason ok,i have ballet practice from 6 to 10.Most of the time we were just babbling away la.But we did practice like shit ok....
Saw grade 7 dance their exercises damn nice and it looks fun.yeah gonna have fun next year.The only thing that i dont understand is why every exercise need to end lying on the floor. Weird choreographer. No offense but it's true that most of it ends on the floor...
So just came back from practice and here i am blogging now....shouldnt i be sleeping haha
*note to myself: Dont eat any more junk food or u cant fit in ur ballet skirt...haha and cant jump high...-.-

open day(freaking sleepy now)

2009-04-18T02:11:00.000-07:00

today is sri kdu's open day....exhausting but it was fun........so we cheered for 2 rounds .One at 10 something the other at 1.45.The stunners routine went well but still didnt feel the semangat though...Anyway it was just open day..So for red house we did 2 rounds and it was fun.We actually didnt panicked but was actually hungry.LOL Cause thought that i will puke if i eat..so ya
Our last stunt didnt went up for the lasts performance maybe we were all too tired.Oh well we did our best.We still got merdeka carnival.NVM i wish that next year will come faster i miss red house cheer.
Then it was the impersonation the form 4 were freaking hilarious but some of the form 1's brought the whole thing down.Arghhhhhh...Anyway oh i woke up at 5.30 today just to go to school to practice for stunners although everyone were late except.A few of them showed up early but fell asleep on the mats.LOL
Everyone was tired because of the practice yesterday.My legs are freaking sore and painful now.:( buhoo
Didnt go to the haunted house cause the line was freaking long.Wait i dont even think there was a line anyway it was crowded with ppl.But i wanted to go badly but at the end i went to primary school to watch their performances.OMG their apeech and drama was like freaking boring A girl keep repeating her lines.She said"please say with Lights,Camera,action" NO one said of course and she repeated it everytime she holds the freaking black and white thingy.LOL. It made me felt sleepy as i was already dying of boredom. Came back at 4.Today is a very long day.I will be going for dance practice from 6 -10 ..Ah kill me!! i am damn Sleepy now.What to do!!

Cheer day

2009-04-17T02:35:00.000-07:00

Today is very tiring.Just had 9 hours of cheer....Feel like a dead fish now.But at least it was fun..Damn pissed with myself cause cant tense when flying. I am really sorry if i hurt you. Tomorrow i need to wake up at 5 can anyone help me or at least wake me up... Cheer two rounds including stunners and house cheer some more need to take care of the stall.EXHAUSTING!!Arghh at night got dance rehearsal in klang. Can my life be any more packed with activities.At least most of it is dancing or not i will be in counseling now:(
going port dickson on sunday.Damn tired la, i dont wanna be the treasurer why choose me.I am not even good in accounts. HELP!! Stress .........
I want to go take a nap now to charge my self!! Or not i will be seriously dead by night time.LOL
*note to myself sleep early today or u will die tomorrow.HAHA

New year new blog LOL

2009-04-16T07:05:00.000-07:00

My ballet studio in klang

Me posing for fun haha

So its 2009.How is everyone doing...Hope everything is fine. So what i learned from this few months of this year was to choose friends and identify who my real friends are. Other than that, of course i have made quite a number of new friends this few months because of cheer.Its not that hard to talk to them cause we had same interest. But it was really dramatic when it comes to house cheer especially near sports day and everyone is weirdly hating each other for the sake of being champion. Too much drama..anyway at least it ends after sports house..Oh this year i joined stunners..Had some great friends there.Changed my position from flyer to base.I didnt thought that basing was actually quite fun excluding the back pain.LOl. My back is too old for the sport haha.
4N of 2009 also called as the 20910 class cause we have very smart ppl,cheerleaders and all kinds of ppl. That was what Miss gaya(eng teacher) said so..LOL.In form4 we had some awesome teachers .So there is Miss hoo,Miss gaya,Miss chandini. They are cool to be with.

Anyway my life is secondary 4 was mostly about cheer and paramount for now..Cause for the preparation for open day and cheer 2009. Oh We got in group singing finals for paramount.It was quite hard for me to believe...Still thinking what song are we going to sing for finals..Please do give any suggestions of songs. This saturday will be Sri KDU open day we still didnt got the whole routine done yet.Rushing haha.....Anyway tomorow will be a full day rehearsal...

I can bet that tomorow i will be freaking exhausted bacause of cheer ,tuition and ballet.Can anyone help me...Arghhh Class test 2 and my ballet examinations are due next week.The STRESS!! Nevermind i need to cope with it....Ok i will stop here .Hope to blog sooner..
Oh i will be posting some of the pic that i have taken during ballet(sorry if it is blurr)